The story was all start at "we chat".
We became friends.. then lovers.
but only "us" knows..
we live both in the city yet
we met only once a month or twice
sometimes takes more longer..
because were both busy.
But honestly
i'm afraid to be more attached with him
. I'm afraid to be in love
I'm afraid to fall then can't pull back with
If drowning already empowered me.
Then months passed by with the same set up..
he won. i fall for him (di niya alam)
The first set up was changed.
I can't wait to see him again kahit kaka kita lang namin
I felt excited every met and f**cked ups
I learned things about it i never knew i could.. I learned how and when to wear "s e x y" undies..
And that makes me wanna see him every week..
We planned to rent a room for "us"
to be together and to f***k everyday.
Later on.. i felt something wrong
He keeps on asking me money.
I was the one who pay for the motel bill.
I pay for our meals. I even give him fare so he can went home.
Then questions randomly popped up.
Why? Saan na napunta pera niya?
Anong meron?.
Then i decide to stop it. Na feel ko na
Na para bang pinag peperahan na niya ako .. pero bakit?. Di naman ako mayaman. Mas malaki pa nga sahod niya sakin.. so we stop seeing each other. I let myself busy at work.
2 months later .. he called and i never expected for it. Because i'm tired being used. Being taken for granted. But he say sorry asking forgiveness. He wants me back.. he promised to take care of me that he never did before.. so i say YES. .
pero parang nag worst..
nag te text nalang siya if gusto niya makipag kita.
He even asked first if i have spare money for him to borrow.. ofcourse i say no. . Then we stop seeing each other again..
Di nagtagal. Nag message siya aalis na siya magpapa DUMAGUETE na siya.. dun na siya mag wo work.. para sakin as if i care pa?. Yes. I admit i hate him. Nagalit ako sa kanya. . Pero di ba sabi ko na fall na ako sa kanya.. so the communication was still there.. he asked me to visit him.. or he will visit me here in cebu.. because he missed me so much.. he even told me he loves me..pero.. ako pa magprovide pamasahe niya. . Dahil nga grabe yung desires ko sa kanya. So nag yes na naman ako.. pero it makes me think.. bakit pa ba??. Dapat nuon pa lang pinutol ko na to eh.. dapat i wont let someone do this to me.. so di ako tumuloy nagalit siya..
Lastly.. i saw his facebook account. He post it on his cover profile . He seems so happy. They were happy, that i guess i never did for him?.
Questions wants to burst then Why?. Why? Why he even can't hold my hands when were walking down the street. Why i can't post something sweet on her wall?. Why i can't visit him in their house?. Why i can't be with him together with his friends??.Why he can't even ask me for a date?. Why ?.panget ba ako??. Kapalit palit ba ako??. . and i just did nothing but to cry.. im too tired to argue when theres someone already won the "label".
P.s.. judge me if you're perfect enough.
-bagul-
We became friends.. then lovers.
but only "us" knows..
we live both in the city yet
we met only once a month or twice
sometimes takes more longer..
because were both busy.
But honestly
i'm afraid to be more attached with him
. I'm afraid to be in love
I'm afraid to fall then can't pull back with
If drowning already empowered me.
Then months passed by with the same set up..
he won. i fall for him (di niya alam)
The first set up was changed.
I can't wait to see him again kahit kaka kita lang namin
I felt excited every met and f**cked ups
I learned things about it i never knew i could.. I learned how and when to wear "s e x y" undies..
And that makes me wanna see him every week..
We planned to rent a room for "us"
to be together and to f***k everyday.
Later on.. i felt something wrong
He keeps on asking me money.
I was the one who pay for the motel bill.
I pay for our meals. I even give him fare so he can went home.
Then questions randomly popped up.
Why? Saan na napunta pera niya?
Anong meron?.
Then i decide to stop it. Na feel ko na
Na para bang pinag peperahan na niya ako .. pero bakit?. Di naman ako mayaman. Mas malaki pa nga sahod niya sakin.. so we stop seeing each other. I let myself busy at work.
2 months later .. he called and i never expected for it. Because i'm tired being used. Being taken for granted. But he say sorry asking forgiveness. He wants me back.. he promised to take care of me that he never did before.. so i say YES. .
pero parang nag worst..
nag te text nalang siya if gusto niya makipag kita.
He even asked first if i have spare money for him to borrow.. ofcourse i say no. . Then we stop seeing each other again..
Di nagtagal. Nag message siya aalis na siya magpapa DUMAGUETE na siya.. dun na siya mag wo work.. para sakin as if i care pa?. Yes. I admit i hate him. Nagalit ako sa kanya. . Pero di ba sabi ko na fall na ako sa kanya.. so the communication was still there.. he asked me to visit him.. or he will visit me here in cebu.. because he missed me so much.. he even told me he loves me..pero.. ako pa magprovide pamasahe niya. . Dahil nga grabe yung desires ko sa kanya. So nag yes na naman ako.. pero it makes me think.. bakit pa ba??. Dapat nuon pa lang pinutol ko na to eh.. dapat i wont let someone do this to me.. so di ako tumuloy nagalit siya..
Lastly.. i saw his facebook account. He post it on his cover profile . He seems so happy. They were happy, that i guess i never did for him?.
Questions wants to burst then Why?. Why? Why he even can't hold my hands when were walking down the street. Why i can't post something sweet on her wall?. Why i can't visit him in their house?. Why i can't be with him together with his friends??.Why he can't even ask me for a date?. Why ?.panget ba ako??. Kapalit palit ba ako??. . and i just did nothing but to cry.. im too tired to argue when theres someone already won the "label".
P.s.. judge me if you're perfect enough.
-bagul-
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