PHC - Prince Ellgrey17
Forum Veteran
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- Jul 22, 2017
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MISIS: Dok, kumusta ang aking mister?
DOK: Sorry, po. Mula ngayon, kayo na po ang magpapaligo at magpapakain sa kanya, kasi, putol na ang kanyang mga kamay at paa...
MISIS: HAH?! jusko!! :'(
DOK: He! He! He! Ninerbyos kayo, 'no?! Joke lang! Patay na siya!
=========================
GUMAGANDA
MRS: Naniniwala ka ba na ang babae habang tumatanda ay gumaganda?
MR: Oo naman.
MRS: Sa tingin mo, gumaganda ba ako?
MR: Sa tingin ko, hindi ka tumatanda.
========================
MATAPANG
LASING: Hoy! Sinong matapang? Labas!
LALAKE: Ako! Bakit? Lalaban ka?
LASING: Pare, ihatid mo naman ako sa bahay, natatakot ako kay misis eh.
=================================
KOTSE
TATAY: Asenso na talaga ang anak natin sa US. Eto, nagpadala ng picture, nakasandal sa kotse. Basahin mo nga ang nakasulat sa likod?
NANAY: Inay, nagpapasalamat ako, kasi kung hindi dahil sa kotse na ito, natumba na ako sa sobrang gutom.
===============================
What would happen if you have a wooden car with wooden
wheels, a wooden chair and a wooden engine?
It wooden start!!!
==============================
LONG DISTANCE CALL
Operator: AT&T, How may I help you?
Pinoy: Heyloow. Ay wud like to long distans da Pilipins, plis.
Operator: Name of the party you’re calling?
Pinoy: Aybegurpardon? Can you repit agen plis?
Operator: What is the name of the person you are calling?
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu and sori. Da name of my calling is Elpidio Abanquel.
Operator: Please spell out the name of the person you’re callingphonetically.
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. What is foneticali?
Operator: Please spell out the letters comprising the name aletter at a time and citing a word for each letter.
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu. Da name of Elpidio Abanquel is Elpidio Abanquel. I will spell his name foneticali,
Elpidio:
E as in Elpidio,
L as in lpidio,
P as in pidio,
I as in idio,
D as in dio,
I as in io, and
O as in o.
Operator: Sir, can you please use English words.
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu. Abanquel:
A as in Airport ,
B as in Because,
A as in airport agen,
N as in enemy,
Q as in Cuba ,
U as in Europe ,
E as in important, and
L as in elephant.
============================
Umoorder na Pinoy
Waiter: What kind of coffee would you like, regular or decaf?
Pinoy: No, Big cup!! Big cup!
Waiter: What would you like for your breakfast?
Pinoy: Hameneggs.
Waiter: And how do you like your eggs, sir?
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. I like dem beri much.
Waiter: No sir, I mean how would you like them cooked?
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. I wud like dem cooked.
Waiter: (with increasing impatience) Would you like your eggs…fried? poached? hard boiled or soft boiled?
Pinoy: (with increasing uneasiness) Yes, one fried en one hard boiled or sop boiled.
Waiter: And what bread would you like?
Pinoy: Begyurpardon?
Waiter: What kind of bread would you like? white? rye? whole wheat? toast?
Pinoy: Pan Americano
Waiter: We don’t have that.
Pinoy: Okey, gib me taystee.
Waiter: We don’t have that either, sir.
Pinoy: Do you heb pan de lemon or bonete?
Waiter: Sir, you are wasting my time. I shall ask for the last time, what would you like for breakfast?
Pinoy: Donut plis….
==================
Bakit laging Intsik ang kinikidnap?
Kasi pag Pinoy – hulugan!
Pag Bumbay – 5-6!
Pag Kano – credit card!
E pag Intsik – C.O.D.!!!!
Lulubog na ang barko…
PARI: San Pedro, San Jose …
MADRE: Sta. Fe, Sta. Lucia, Sta. Clara…
INTSIK: lubok na balko! tawak pa kayo pasahelo!
ctto
DOK: Sorry, po. Mula ngayon, kayo na po ang magpapaligo at magpapakain sa kanya, kasi, putol na ang kanyang mga kamay at paa...
MISIS: HAH?! jusko!! :'(
DOK: He! He! He! Ninerbyos kayo, 'no?! Joke lang! Patay na siya!
=========================
GUMAGANDA
MRS: Naniniwala ka ba na ang babae habang tumatanda ay gumaganda?
MR: Oo naman.
MRS: Sa tingin mo, gumaganda ba ako?
MR: Sa tingin ko, hindi ka tumatanda.
========================
MATAPANG
LASING: Hoy! Sinong matapang? Labas!
LALAKE: Ako! Bakit? Lalaban ka?
LASING: Pare, ihatid mo naman ako sa bahay, natatakot ako kay misis eh.
=================================
KOTSE
TATAY: Asenso na talaga ang anak natin sa US. Eto, nagpadala ng picture, nakasandal sa kotse. Basahin mo nga ang nakasulat sa likod?
NANAY: Inay, nagpapasalamat ako, kasi kung hindi dahil sa kotse na ito, natumba na ako sa sobrang gutom.
===============================
What would happen if you have a wooden car with wooden
wheels, a wooden chair and a wooden engine?
It wooden start!!!
==============================
LONG DISTANCE CALL
Operator: AT&T, How may I help you?
Pinoy: Heyloow. Ay wud like to long distans da Pilipins, plis.
Operator: Name of the party you’re calling?
Pinoy: Aybegurpardon? Can you repit agen plis?
Operator: What is the name of the person you are calling?
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu and sori. Da name of my calling is Elpidio Abanquel.
Operator: Please spell out the name of the person you’re callingphonetically.
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. What is foneticali?
Operator: Please spell out the letters comprising the name aletter at a time and citing a word for each letter.
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu. Da name of Elpidio Abanquel is Elpidio Abanquel. I will spell his name foneticali,
Elpidio:
E as in Elpidio,
L as in lpidio,
P as in pidio,
I as in idio,
D as in dio,
I as in io, and
O as in o.
Operator: Sir, can you please use English words.
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu. Abanquel:
A as in Airport ,
B as in Because,
A as in airport agen,
N as in enemy,
Q as in Cuba ,
U as in Europe ,
E as in important, and
L as in elephant.
============================
Umoorder na Pinoy
Waiter: What kind of coffee would you like, regular or decaf?
Pinoy: No, Big cup!! Big cup!
Waiter: What would you like for your breakfast?
Pinoy: Hameneggs.
Waiter: And how do you like your eggs, sir?
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. I like dem beri much.
Waiter: No sir, I mean how would you like them cooked?
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. I wud like dem cooked.
Waiter: (with increasing impatience) Would you like your eggs…fried? poached? hard boiled or soft boiled?
Pinoy: (with increasing uneasiness) Yes, one fried en one hard boiled or sop boiled.
Waiter: And what bread would you like?
Pinoy: Begyurpardon?
Waiter: What kind of bread would you like? white? rye? whole wheat? toast?
Pinoy: Pan Americano
Waiter: We don’t have that.
Pinoy: Okey, gib me taystee.
Waiter: We don’t have that either, sir.
Pinoy: Do you heb pan de lemon or bonete?
Waiter: Sir, you are wasting my time. I shall ask for the last time, what would you like for breakfast?
Pinoy: Donut plis….
==================
Bakit laging Intsik ang kinikidnap?
Kasi pag Pinoy – hulugan!
Pag Bumbay – 5-6!
Pag Kano – credit card!
E pag Intsik – C.O.D.!!!!
Lulubog na ang barko…
PARI: San Pedro, San Jose …
MADRE: Sta. Fe, Sta. Lucia, Sta. Clara…
INTSIK: lubok na balko! tawak pa kayo pasahelo!
ctto
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