Binyagang catholic, catholic in practice and tradition, catholic in self discipline.
Pero always atheist in belief. Mula nung bata ako mulat na ako na mali practices. But i just go along kasi its family. Its ritual, its tradition. Its politics. I just cant get myself to believe in a sky dad, heaven, or hell. We have to. Kasi essentially, pamilya namin ang nagtayo ng simbahan sa lugar namin. We were always viewed as a model family sa barangay.
Since teen, i never pray when i'm in despair or when in need. I only pray for thanks and forgiveness of others as form of meditation. Maybe i'm just prideful that way. They say it's a sin. But life has always blessed me despite that. Nung single ako nagsisimba lng ako pag bday ko. Nung mag-asawa, weekly nmn na. Kahit papano gusto ko padin ipasa yung tradisyon sa magiging anak ko.
Nalulungkot ako para sa mga naglulumuhod, naniniwala, pero hindi padin mkatanggap ng blessing. Merong iba sumakabilang buhay in pain. Merong iba na scam s mga church activities.
That just further confirms para sakin, marami tao sa pinas ang willing to play into the illusion, but still life is unfair. Siguro kailangan nlng nila yun para mas madali tanggapin sa puso nila ang mga misfortune sa buhay nila.