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That is a joke. But like the old saying goes, "jokes are half meant".
You see, March used to be the first month of the year. January and February use to be insignificant months way back in the past. But that would eventually change. It was in around 700 BC that the second King of Rome, Numa Pompilius supposedly rescued them from the dark depths of the end of the year and gave them the ultimate upgrade, making them the first months of the year.
Anyway, let us go through all months and learn where all of the names of the month came from and the culture, tradition, practices and myths they are associated with. I will not go too deep on them. But just enough to answer some curiosities on why months are called and treated a certain way. But anyway, here it is. (You can now scroll down to the end for a table of all months)
MARCH
I can imagine that the Roman god of war Mars was absolutely livid to see the month named after him bumped down to third place. March or Martius to the Romans - was the month when offerings were made to Mars ahead of the military campaigning season.
Old English had a few extra names for the month of March too. One of them was Hlyda or later, Lide. Lide shares its root with our word loud because it was "the month noisy with wind and storm" - according to Bede (Saint Bede), in reference to British weather during the month.
The Anglo Saxons also had another name for March that better fits with the militaristic name given by the Romans. They named it after their pre-Christian goddess Hreða(Hretha) who was the goddess of glory, they call it Hreðmōnāð (Hrethmonath).
APRIL
This is another name given to us by the Romans, who called it Aprilis. However, where they got that name from is up in the air.
One of the theories goes that it ultimately derives from the Greek goddess Aphrodite. Her Roman equivalent was Venus, so its position next to Mars in the calendar makes this an elegant explanation. But we're not sure.
Another elegant - but probably inaccurate - explanation is that Aprilis derives from the Latin verb "Aperire", meaning "to open". After all, this pleasant spring month is the time when flowers open up and reveal their beauty to the world. This would give it the same etymological root as the words aperitif - a lovely drink to open up your evening meal. And aperture, which is an opening. It's a nice explanation but... Yeah. A lot of clever people think it's nonsense.
Once again, the Anglo Saxons took on the Latin name for the month, but they also had their own: Ēastermōnað (Eastermonath). Yes, that's Easter month.
It's obviously not named after the Christian festival of Easter, because this is a pre-Christian term. If anything, it's the other way round. In English, Easter has the name that it has because it falls in the pagan Eastermōnað - Easter month. Easter month appears to get its name from the Germanic goddess of Spring, Easter... or Eostre, or Ostara, or Eastro. She went by many names to many different Germanic peoples.
MAY
May is named after the Roman goddess Maia, a fertility goddess who oversaw the growth of plants. Appropriate for this springtime month, right? Maia is NOT to be confused with the Greek goddess Maia: lover of Zeus and mother of Hermes.
Great! But straight onto the other name for May in Old English, and that was þrimilcemōnað (Thrimilcemonath), pronoumced as three-milky-monath. Literally, three milk month!
Hold onto your udders! I'll let our pal Bede explain why. In 725 AD he wrote that "the fifth month is called Thrimilci in our language, because before, there was such abundance in Britain and also in Germania, whence the Angle-people came to Britain, they would milk their cows thrice a day."
So basically, the longer days and lush pastures meant you could give dear Daisy a good old milking three times every day during May. This fact delighted the Angles so much that they named the entire month after it!
JUNE
June. And indeed, June is most widely thought to be named after the Roman deity Juno. She was the Romans' chief goddess and their goddess of women and marriage. One classic Juno anecdote is that she flew into a jealous rage when her husband gave birth to Minerva from his own head! You think your family has problems.
There is also a theory that June gets its name from the same root as "juniors", as in the young ones. Which could make sense, following swiftly on the heels of spring with all that new life bounding around. Again, Old English had an alternative name for June, according to Bede.
June was the first month of a two-month period known as Lithe or leether. Lithe was midsummer, when gentle weather provided the perfect conditions for traveling. The first month of Lithe, ie. June was called by the Anglo Saxons Ærra Liða (Arra Litha). Ærra has the same root as our modern words "early" and the rather old fashioned "ere". Hence, early, first or pre-Lithe.
JULY
Our next month is of course July. I say "of course" but actually, by Roman standards, July is a relatively new name for it. The month was named after emperor Julius Caesar after his death in 44BC. It was the month in which he was born. But what were the Romans calling it before that?
Well they were calling it Quintilius.
You might recognise the start of that word from other words like, for example, "quintuplets". A woman who gives birth to quintuplets gives birth to five babies. Ouch.
And quintilis literally meant "fifth" because it was, at one point, the fifth month in the Roman calendar - back when March was the first month, and the dark months that became January and February were down at the other end. Quintilis kicks off a pattern that we'll see with the rest of the months.
Meanwhile, to pick up on a thread from June. We talked about the Anglo Saxons calling June Ærra Liða-early lithe. Well the second month of Lithe - i.e. July was known as Æfterra Liða (Afterra Litha) - After Lithe, or second Lithe.
AUGUST
August shares a similar story with July. August was not the first name that the Romans gave to that month. I mentioned how Quintilis began a sequence that continued for the rest of the year - and so it did. The Romans were originally calling July.... Have you guessed it?
Sextilis, which meant sixth!
It was renamed after Augustus Caesar during his reign, in 8 BC. Why that month of all months? Well, supposedly because a lot of events significant to his rise to power happened during Sextilis - including the fall of Alexandria on what became August the 1st.
Another pattern that you're probably spotting is that the Anglo Saxons had an alternative name for everything - as well they might!
In the case of August, it was the rather inauspicious sounding Weodmōnað - weed month. This was the time of year when the fields would become overrun with perfidious little plants. Conditions were perfect for weeds.
Incidentally I checked for you. US National Cannabis Awareness Month is in April, not August. An opportunity missed.
SEPTEMBER, OCTOBER, NOVEMBER & DECEMBER
I'm going to group the next, and final, four months together. And I'm sure by now you have worked out why. September, October, November and December all get their names from where they originally sat in the Roman calendar.
September was the seventh month - from septem, meaning seven, October was the eighth - think of octopus and octagon. November was the ninth month and December was the tenth!
Simple, right?
Not so simple were the alternative names in Old English, according to our friendly friar Bede.
September was variously known as Hærfestmonað (Harfestmonath) - the harvest month, for obvious reasons, and Hāligmönað, which meant holy month. Why so holy? Well Bede says it's because this was the time for pre-Christian offerings to the gods. Presumably in the hope of securing a hefty harvest.
October was known to the Anglo Saxons as Wintefylleð (Wintefileth) - because it was the month of the full moon that heralded the start of Winter. I like that one. A bit better than "weed month" Although even weed month seems gentle in the face of our next one.
November was known as... Blötmōnað (Blutmonath). Sacrifice month. According to the Venerable Bede, this was a time for slaughter... of cattle. Herds were traditionally sent to meet their maker or makers during November, with some of them being killed as offerings to the gods. Some sources also have November down as Blödmönað which would be the equally morbid, "blood month". I prefer November.
And onto December. This is about the Pagan festival of Yule which fell around the last month of the year. Yule was a pre-Christian festival around the end of the year, which we believe for the Anglo Saxons was the 25th of December, and the winter solstice. After Yule was worth marking because it meant the days were finally getting longer. Neo-Pagans still celebrate Yule.
Elsewhere the word is sometimes used to refer to Christmas. We still occasionally call that period "yuletide" - tide being an early English word for time. Think of Zeit and tijd in German and Dutch.
December simply called Gēolmōnað (Yolmonath) - Yule month.
JANUARY
And then we come remaing two - not with Undecember or Duodecember, but with January and February. Once the final two months of the year, but for the last two-thousand-one-hundred-and-75 cycled or so, now the first two.
One of the reasons it was moved to the front page of the calendar in 153 BC was the association between Janus and getting off to a good start. Plus his two faces meant he could peer back at the year just passed, and stare forward at the twelve months to come.
Janus was also the god of endings, and the god of doorways. There were ceremonial gateways around ancient Rome through which the armies would march off to battle and then hopefully return, and they were named after Janus. Back to the calendar though, and specifically to the English language.
In Old English, which was being spoken a thousand years ago, the first month of the year was known as lānuariusmōnað (Yanuariusmonath).
But the Anglo Saxons also had their own name for January - or at least a period that rough aligns with it - the Old English Æfterra Geola (Afterra Yola)- after Geol - or the next month of what was mentioned earlier, Yule month (December).
FEBRUARY
The Romans gave us this name too. It comes from their god Februus, who was celebrated during this month. Februus was the god associated with death and purification, which came together grimly in the sacrifices that were made during his festival, Februalia.
For a period it was actually the last month of the Roman calendar. January and February were for a time considered so-called "dark months" by the Romans. In fact, for a while they didn't even bother to name them. Nothing could be achieved at this miserable terminus of the year. It was too cold to fight, to farm or head out on your travels. It was just this barren blank spot on the calendar.
Old English took on the Roman name for the month with Februariusmōnað (Februariusmonath). But according to the Venerable Bede, February was also known to the Anglo Saxons as Solmōnað (Solmonath). The likely explanation is that it shares a root with our word soil, and February was actually the "muddy month".
BONUS TRIVIA
Now (due to the god Februus, god of death and purification), it makes more sense that the month of February is considered as sad month by some people, for their lack of valentine da.. uhmm... no not that. jk
Here is the real bonus trivia. Now it makes more sense that the "leap day" is added on February, and February only has 28 days normally (which is already weird to begin with). Because it is actually the original end of the year.
I love these Old English month names! And d'you know who else did? J.R.R. Tolkein. He resurrected a lot of them, including Afterlithe(July), when he published the Hobbits' Shire Calendar in the third book of his Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Return of the King. He also used Afteryule(January) and Solmath(February).
Thank you reading.
You see, March used to be the first month of the year. January and February use to be insignificant months way back in the past. But that would eventually change. It was in around 700 BC that the second King of Rome, Numa Pompilius supposedly rescued them from the dark depths of the end of the year and gave them the ultimate upgrade, making them the first months of the year.
Anyway, let us go through all months and learn where all of the names of the month came from and the culture, tradition, practices and myths they are associated with. I will not go too deep on them. But just enough to answer some curiosities on why months are called and treated a certain way. But anyway, here it is. (You can now scroll down to the end for a table of all months)
MARCH
I can imagine that the Roman god of war Mars was absolutely livid to see the month named after him bumped down to third place. March or Martius to the Romans - was the month when offerings were made to Mars ahead of the military campaigning season.
Old English had a few extra names for the month of March too. One of them was Hlyda or later, Lide. Lide shares its root with our word loud because it was "the month noisy with wind and storm" - according to Bede (Saint Bede), in reference to British weather during the month.
The Anglo Saxons also had another name for March that better fits with the militaristic name given by the Romans. They named it after their pre-Christian goddess Hreða(Hretha) who was the goddess of glory, they call it Hreðmōnāð (Hrethmonath).
APRIL
This is another name given to us by the Romans, who called it Aprilis. However, where they got that name from is up in the air.
One of the theories goes that it ultimately derives from the Greek goddess Aphrodite. Her Roman equivalent was Venus, so its position next to Mars in the calendar makes this an elegant explanation. But we're not sure.
Another elegant - but probably inaccurate - explanation is that Aprilis derives from the Latin verb "Aperire", meaning "to open". After all, this pleasant spring month is the time when flowers open up and reveal their beauty to the world. This would give it the same etymological root as the words aperitif - a lovely drink to open up your evening meal. And aperture, which is an opening. It's a nice explanation but... Yeah. A lot of clever people think it's nonsense.
Once again, the Anglo Saxons took on the Latin name for the month, but they also had their own: Ēastermōnað (Eastermonath). Yes, that's Easter month.
It's obviously not named after the Christian festival of Easter, because this is a pre-Christian term. If anything, it's the other way round. In English, Easter has the name that it has because it falls in the pagan Eastermōnað - Easter month. Easter month appears to get its name from the Germanic goddess of Spring, Easter... or Eostre, or Ostara, or Eastro. She went by many names to many different Germanic peoples.
MAY
May is named after the Roman goddess Maia, a fertility goddess who oversaw the growth of plants. Appropriate for this springtime month, right? Maia is NOT to be confused with the Greek goddess Maia: lover of Zeus and mother of Hermes.
Great! But straight onto the other name for May in Old English, and that was þrimilcemōnað (Thrimilcemonath), pronoumced as three-milky-monath. Literally, three milk month!
Hold onto your udders! I'll let our pal Bede explain why. In 725 AD he wrote that "the fifth month is called Thrimilci in our language, because before, there was such abundance in Britain and also in Germania, whence the Angle-people came to Britain, they would milk their cows thrice a day."
So basically, the longer days and lush pastures meant you could give dear Daisy a good old milking three times every day during May. This fact delighted the Angles so much that they named the entire month after it!
JUNE
June. And indeed, June is most widely thought to be named after the Roman deity Juno. She was the Romans' chief goddess and their goddess of women and marriage. One classic Juno anecdote is that she flew into a jealous rage when her husband gave birth to Minerva from his own head! You think your family has problems.
There is also a theory that June gets its name from the same root as "juniors", as in the young ones. Which could make sense, following swiftly on the heels of spring with all that new life bounding around. Again, Old English had an alternative name for June, according to Bede.
June was the first month of a two-month period known as Lithe or leether. Lithe was midsummer, when gentle weather provided the perfect conditions for traveling. The first month of Lithe, ie. June was called by the Anglo Saxons Ærra Liða (Arra Litha). Ærra has the same root as our modern words "early" and the rather old fashioned "ere". Hence, early, first or pre-Lithe.
JULY
Our next month is of course July. I say "of course" but actually, by Roman standards, July is a relatively new name for it. The month was named after emperor Julius Caesar after his death in 44BC. It was the month in which he was born. But what were the Romans calling it before that?
Well they were calling it Quintilius.
You might recognise the start of that word from other words like, for example, "quintuplets". A woman who gives birth to quintuplets gives birth to five babies. Ouch.
And quintilis literally meant "fifth" because it was, at one point, the fifth month in the Roman calendar - back when March was the first month, and the dark months that became January and February were down at the other end. Quintilis kicks off a pattern that we'll see with the rest of the months.
Meanwhile, to pick up on a thread from June. We talked about the Anglo Saxons calling June Ærra Liða-early lithe. Well the second month of Lithe - i.e. July was known as Æfterra Liða (Afterra Litha) - After Lithe, or second Lithe.
AUGUST
August shares a similar story with July. August was not the first name that the Romans gave to that month. I mentioned how Quintilis began a sequence that continued for the rest of the year - and so it did. The Romans were originally calling July.... Have you guessed it?
Sextilis, which meant sixth!
It was renamed after Augustus Caesar during his reign, in 8 BC. Why that month of all months? Well, supposedly because a lot of events significant to his rise to power happened during Sextilis - including the fall of Alexandria on what became August the 1st.
Another pattern that you're probably spotting is that the Anglo Saxons had an alternative name for everything - as well they might!
In the case of August, it was the rather inauspicious sounding Weodmōnað - weed month. This was the time of year when the fields would become overrun with perfidious little plants. Conditions were perfect for weeds.
Incidentally I checked for you. US National Cannabis Awareness Month is in April, not August. An opportunity missed.
SEPTEMBER, OCTOBER, NOVEMBER & DECEMBER
I'm going to group the next, and final, four months together. And I'm sure by now you have worked out why. September, October, November and December all get their names from where they originally sat in the Roman calendar.
September was the seventh month - from septem, meaning seven, October was the eighth - think of octopus and octagon. November was the ninth month and December was the tenth!
Simple, right?
Not so simple were the alternative names in Old English, according to our friendly friar Bede.
September was variously known as Hærfestmonað (Harfestmonath) - the harvest month, for obvious reasons, and Hāligmönað, which meant holy month. Why so holy? Well Bede says it's because this was the time for pre-Christian offerings to the gods. Presumably in the hope of securing a hefty harvest.
October was known to the Anglo Saxons as Wintefylleð (Wintefileth) - because it was the month of the full moon that heralded the start of Winter. I like that one. A bit better than "weed month" Although even weed month seems gentle in the face of our next one.
November was known as... Blötmōnað (Blutmonath). Sacrifice month. According to the Venerable Bede, this was a time for slaughter... of cattle. Herds were traditionally sent to meet their maker or makers during November, with some of them being killed as offerings to the gods. Some sources also have November down as Blödmönað which would be the equally morbid, "blood month". I prefer November.
And onto December. This is about the Pagan festival of Yule which fell around the last month of the year. Yule was a pre-Christian festival around the end of the year, which we believe for the Anglo Saxons was the 25th of December, and the winter solstice. After Yule was worth marking because it meant the days were finally getting longer. Neo-Pagans still celebrate Yule.
Elsewhere the word is sometimes used to refer to Christmas. We still occasionally call that period "yuletide" - tide being an early English word for time. Think of Zeit and tijd in German and Dutch.
December simply called Gēolmōnað (Yolmonath) - Yule month.
JANUARY
And then we come remaing two - not with Undecember or Duodecember, but with January and February. Once the final two months of the year, but for the last two-thousand-one-hundred-and-75 cycled or so, now the first two.
One of the reasons it was moved to the front page of the calendar in 153 BC was the association between Janus and getting off to a good start. Plus his two faces meant he could peer back at the year just passed, and stare forward at the twelve months to come.
Janus was also the god of endings, and the god of doorways. There were ceremonial gateways around ancient Rome through which the armies would march off to battle and then hopefully return, and they were named after Janus. Back to the calendar though, and specifically to the English language.
In Old English, which was being spoken a thousand years ago, the first month of the year was known as lānuariusmōnað (Yanuariusmonath).
But the Anglo Saxons also had their own name for January - or at least a period that rough aligns with it - the Old English Æfterra Geola (Afterra Yola)- after Geol - or the next month of what was mentioned earlier, Yule month (December).
FEBRUARY
The Romans gave us this name too. It comes from their god Februus, who was celebrated during this month. Februus was the god associated with death and purification, which came together grimly in the sacrifices that were made during his festival, Februalia.
For a period it was actually the last month of the Roman calendar. January and February were for a time considered so-called "dark months" by the Romans. In fact, for a while they didn't even bother to name them. Nothing could be achieved at this miserable terminus of the year. It was too cold to fight, to farm or head out on your travels. It was just this barren blank spot on the calendar.
Old English took on the Roman name for the month with Februariusmōnað (Februariusmonath). But according to the Venerable Bede, February was also known to the Anglo Saxons as Solmōnað (Solmonath). The likely explanation is that it shares a root with our word soil, and February was actually the "muddy month".
BONUS TRIVIA
Now (due to the god Februus, god of death and purification), it makes more sense that the month of February is considered as sad month by some people, for their lack of valentine da.. uhmm... no not that. jk
Here is the real bonus trivia. Now it makes more sense that the "leap day" is added on February, and February only has 28 days normally (which is already weird to begin with). Because it is actually the original end of the year.
| ROMAN | OLD ENGLISH/ ANGLO-SAXON | |
| MARCH | Martius | Hlyde/Lide Hrethmonath |
| APRIL | Aprilius | Eastermonath |
| MAY | Maius | Thrimilcemonath |
| JUNE | Iunius | Arra Litha |
| JULY | Quintilius (Julius) | Afterra Litha |
| AUGUST | Sextilius (Augustus) | Weodmonath |
| SEPTEMBER | Septimus | Haligmonath |
| OCTOBER | Octavus | Winterfylleth |
| NOVEMBER | Nonus | Blotmonath |
| DECEMBER | Decimus | Arra Geola Geolmonath |
| JANUARY | Ianuarius | Afterra Geola |
| FEBRUARY | Februarius | Feruariusmonath Solmonath |
I love these Old English month names! And d'you know who else did? J.R.R. Tolkein. He resurrected a lot of them, including Afterlithe(July), when he published the Hobbits' Shire Calendar in the third book of his Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Return of the King. He also used Afteryule(January) and Solmath(February).
Thank you reading.
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